"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
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