I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I've blown a few things in my day
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize