why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Randomize
