"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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