3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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