I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
