I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
