Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize