they need to just BURY HIM!
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
