I want to stick my p in your. b.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
