I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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