I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
