So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
