Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Found the puke drawer
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
