I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
you never un-have a 4some
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
