Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
The convent might be a nice break from real life
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
