Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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