Just fell off a train. Bad.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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