There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
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