I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
if only i could text you this smell
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
