is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
