wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize
