I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
