at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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