I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
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