I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
