Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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