thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
