He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
