New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
