Farmville is her only friend.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
