Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
