sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
