I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
i now understand why vodka
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
