I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
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