my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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