hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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