You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
She needs sedatives and a leash
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
