3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
