if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
