Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
he just fucked me for my cheese.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
