It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
She bit a glass in half.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
