so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Randomize