so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Randomize
