FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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