he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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