Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
