i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Randomize
