this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
How does one acquire holy water?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
