Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Randomize
